Hey there,

Good morning.

This is the 10th edition of Second Act Creator! Let’s keep rolling. In today’s issue:

• One big thing. The one pill for happiness isn’t what you think—and you can’t take it alone.

• You have to check this out. Tales of mastery, plus what’s in and what’s out for 2025. ✅❌

• Tools & Tech. The master mouse. 🐭

Refill that coffee and let’s dive in.

1️⃣ ONE BIG THING

The shared happy pill.

Pills are a modern miracle.

Take aspirin, for example. Its story stretches back over 3,500 years when ancient Egyptians used willow bark to relieve pain. But the real breakthrough came in 1897, when Felix Hoffmann, a chemist at Bayer, synthesized acetylsalicylic acid—the aspirin we know today.

Suddenly, a single pill could ease pain, reduce fever, and prevent inflammation. Aspirin wasn’t just a remedy; it was a revolution.

Pills are powerful because they’re convenient, precise, and transformative—a simple solution to a complex problem.

But what about the more elusive problems, like happiness or fulfillment? What if I told you there’s a metaphorical pill for that, too?

The problem of miswanting.

Last week, I described how bad people are at predicting what will make them happy. We’re so confident in our guesses—whether it’s a bigger house, a promotion, or a dream vacation—but research shows we’re repeatedly wrong, even as we insist this can’t be true.

Daniel Gilbert calls this miswanting. You assume things you want will make you happy, but your mental crystal ball has more cracks than a Millennial’s iPhone. Wanting doesn't always lead to liking because your predictions about future liking are often flawed, incomplete, or inaccurate.

What are our sad, flawed, predicting selves to do?

My boy Gilbert has a solution. He’s a Harvard PhD, so it's pretty fancy: stop it.

Stop trusting your predictions.

The alternative:

Look at people who've already lived through the same decisions you are making now.

This is the magic recipe for happiness—a way to sidestep the traps of miswanting. Instead of guessing, learn from others' real-life outcomes. A lot of them.

The good news is that you don’t have to do your own research this time.

Let’s head down the hall, chat with the folks in the research department, and see what they learned from conducting the longest in-depth longitudinal study of human life ever done.

The Harvard Study of Adult Development.

In 1938, Harvard researchers set out to uncover what makes a good life. They began tracking two groups: Harvard undergraduates and boys from Boston’s poorest neighborhoods. Over eight decades, they followed these men—and eventually their families—gathering health records, conducting interviews, and observing their lives.

The results? A mountain of data produced a single, crystal-clear conclusion:

Good relationships are the single most important factor in living a happy and healthy life.

Dr. Robert Waldinger, the study’s director, put it simply:

“If we had to take all 85 years of research and boil it down to one finding, it would be this: Relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period.”

I should probably end today's newsletter here.

I mean, that is it. That’s what they learned. Insanely detailed records (blood samples, DNA samples, EKG readings, fMRI scans, photos, detailed surveys, in-person interviews, and even 25 actual brains donated by participants) of nearly 4,000 people from diverse backgrounds over their entire lives. It’s amazing.

If you're like me, short and simple conclusions like this go in one ear and out the other.

“Relationships are important? Sure, that makes sense. But what about those blue zones? Those people live forever. Isn’t it, like, a mystery? I’m super into that.”

Here’s the thing: as you’ll see below, this single, simple finding (relationships keep us happier and healthier, more so than any other factor in life) appears repeatedly in every research study trying to understand human well-being and longevity—yes, even in the blue zones research.

Let me poke the bear a bit here. Most of them are in deep slumber right now, so it is probably safe. 🐻

Are you investing more in your relationships than your career, retirement savings account, vacation planning, or biceps?

I will start by saying I am not. It’s hard to admit, but I am not. I am doing pretty well (hi friends!), but is it the thing I invest in more than anything else? No.

If you’ll join me in a similar reflection, please keep reading.

The real-life happy pill.

Let's start with more details on what the Harvard study found. They uncovered two different ways relationships shape our lives:

They bring happiness:

• Participants who reported feeling most connected to others were consistently the happiest—not just in moments of connection but in their overall sense of life satisfaction.

• Social ties protect us during hard times, helping us weather the storms of illness, job loss, or grief with greater resilience.

They allow us to live longer:

• Relationships don’t just feel good; they do good. Strong social connections reduce stress and its damaging effects on the body, lowering risks of chronic diseases like heart disease and diabetes.

• Participants with strong relationships were found to have healthier brain function as they aged, with less memory decline.

• Perhaps most striking: People with strong connections lived longer, period. The researchers found that loneliness was as harmful to longevity as smoking or heavy drinking.

More science, please.

The Harvard Study isn't the only research study to reach this conclusion. Relationships have been studied extensively across cultures and populations, and the evidence keeps pointing to the same truth: social connections don't just improve your happiness—they save your life.

Consider this: a meta-analysis led by Julianne Holt-Lunstad reviewed 148 studies involving over 300,000 participants from around the globe. The findings were staggering:

• Social connection increased the odds of surviving any given year by more than 50%.

• Conversely, individuals with the fewest ties had mortality rates 2.3 (for men) to 2.8 times (for women) higher than those with the strongest connections.

To put this in perspective, the impact of strong relationships on survival is on par with quitting smoking. 🚬🚬

If you had a 55-year-old friend who smoked, you would worry. “Those things will kill you.” No one seems to say this about loneliness, do they?

Another study in Alameda County, California, tracked nearly 5,000 adults over nine years. It revealed that individuals with weaker social networks were twice as likely to die during the study period as those with stronger ties.

In the words of James House and colleagues: “Social relationships are protective of health because they moderate or buffer the effects of stress, providing emotional sustenance, practical help, and a sense of meaning.”

How relationships work their magic.

The benefits of relationships go beyond emotional comfort. They create a ripple effect that transforms both mental and physical health:

Stress Reduction: Social connections buffer against life's inevitable challenges. Whether it's a friend to talk to, a partner to lean on, or a sense of belonging in your community, relationships help regulate stress, preventing it from damaging your health.

Healthy Behaviors: Relationships encourage us to adopt and maintain healthier habits. Loved ones often inspire us to exercise more, eat better, or seek medical care when needed. They hold us accountable and celebrate our progress.

Physiological Benefits: Connections with others reduce blood pressure, strengthen the immune system, and slow cognitive decline. People with close social ties also have lower levels of cortisol, the stress hormone that contributes to chronic conditions like inflammation and heart disease.

This is why relationships are more than a source of happiness—they’re a source of health.

Is it too late for me?

Something about our approach to relationships seems set in stone.

Can anything really change?

Are our social habits, personality traits, or past experiences just baked in? Is it too late to build better relationships and find new connections?

The Harvard Study spent decades answering these very questions, and the answer is clear:

It’s never too late.

This one is worth an extended quote from the research:

If there is a pill that leads to a more fulfilling, longer life, this is it.

But it’s a pill you can’t take alone.

That’s it for today.

See you next Sunday.